October 19, 2025. 1730~2130
Photo by me.
The following is a journal of my thoughts during the journey.
I sat in a pool on my own filth and experienced realities.
My phone was candy shop with experiences I could feel, all in the palm of my hand.
Where the fuck have we gone wrong.
*
Is anyone there?
I'm in here, alone. A rat trapped in its own cage.
I feel the filth that is me.
I am a city rat.
A self aware rat in a trap.
I have no where to go so what the fuck else than to self distruct.
I am trapped in my own mind.
What the fuck else do than to look at myself.
Reconstruct myself
Look at myself and deconstruct the self
Then, rebuild the self
**
I lost myself
I am lost in weird worlds
Worlds of flesh and mushrooms
Of tripping
Wow, how has 2 hours passed?
How does time operate?
Where am I?
I feel like i am lost.
***
I felt what the future generations had to deal with.
We are all rats trapped in this terrarium.
This earth is running out of resources.
Can you feel it?
The billionaires sit there in their mansions.
Squeezing every last resource out of us.
There is only so much time left before we feel the impact of each and every action we take.
****
Take me for example.
I am a mouse trapped in this maze.
Now.
Now I am self aware.
I can see that there are other mice trapped in this maze.
The maze has become bigger.
The maze has become more complex.
There are other mice in this maze, there are other things that are not mice.
These things have needs that are different from the mice.
I'm fucking tripping balls man.
Who am I talking to and what am I doing.
I'm just taking up space on my phone.
Just writing-
*****
Fuck I am tripping balls.
How many hours has it been?
How does time fucking work.
Who am I?
And what are all these things I see?
I had a thought.
It came and went.
Just like me.
But my stink is still here.
Fuck I stink.
Everything is warped.
I can't remember the last thing I said.
******
Wow.
Fuck I tripped so hard and saw what I was.
I am a fucking weirdo rat-possom with shiny sparkling garbage with daddy issues.
I absolutely lost my fucking mind.
I must be careful, it’s so easy to get lost in here.
I absolutely lost my fucking shit.
I became a different person.
Minds are mazes.
They are labyrinths.
I do not know where I have been for the last few months.
This body is a vessel for something else.
Something is coming.
Can you hear it?
Something is coming.
I left myself for a moment and heard that I was only talking to myself.
I am a fucking weirdo.
I am a smelly weirdo.
I am a rat trapped in a maze.
We are rats trapped in a terrarium.
Unless we change, work together, there won't be a future.
There are like a million thoughts running through my head.
I came out.
The rat was still trapped in the same maze.
There is an exit but we must work to it together.
Help one another man.
*******
“The grab for resources.”
I felt the things that the future generations have to fight for.
Their deteriorating bodies were filled with microplastics and lead. They could barely lift their degrading bodies out of bed. Resources were so scarce that they relied on their robots to do all the labor for them. The robots did the dishes, laundry, cooking, cleaning and farming. They took care of basic fucking things because humanity became too fat and stupid to do any of those things.
Humans had became rats.
Rats trapped in a maze.
A maze that they could not find the way out of because they were too stupid to look past their own fucking selfish desires.
********
…Imaginary stories to myself. I am fucking tripping balls man. I got my hello kitty suitcase and Fanny pack like a fucking 10 year old. I just fucking turned 30. This is supposed to be some fucking birthday vacation and im like writing about the future generations and body breaking down im fucking tripping balls there man.
I forgot how tech works.